Guido was almost called Mitchell. Guido temporarily ceased to exist when the powers-that-be messed up his Argentine identity number. Guido was once a man without a country. He was born in Spain of Argentine parents, which meant that Spain didn’t want him because his parents were Argentine and Argentina didn’t want him because he was born in Spain. Thankfully, Italy stood up for Guido, probably because of his name — one of the advantages of not being called Mitchell. Guido lost part of his hearing at the age of three due to chickenpox. A short while thereafter, the vaccine for chickenpox was released. Guido, however, already had the antibodies. Guido eventually traveled to California. Guido had mediocre English. To fix this, Guido read video-game magazines. He was particularly taken with Electronic Gaming Monthly and PC Gamer. Guido would go on to graduate summa cum laude from UCLA with a BA degree in English. This achievement proves that video-games do not produce missed exams and inadequate studying routines. Well, not exclusively. Guido considers himself an Argentine. Even Argentina has come around to consider him an Argentine. Guido might soon live in Buenos Aires. Again.
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